Two tattoo stories about love

Today's story is a little long, and I spent a long time reading it. I couldn't help but cry a few times when I was reading. This is a letter from a Wormhole Tattoo fan, her tattoo story, her love story, her life story. She prepared a romantic proposal, but her lover fell in love with someone else. After breaking up, she went to the British to get the tattoo. Here are all her stories, and I don’t change any words!

I am a girl, and the person I love is also a girl. We have been together for five years. She is now studying in Australia. She promised that she accompanied me to Britain and I would get a tattoo for her. Originally I planned to give her a foreign wedding and buy her a ring. And she accompanied me to get this tattoo, which is also an important keepsake for each other. Everything was on the schedule, but she told me that she loves someone else. I don’t know English at all, but I still went to Britain alone and got this tattoo.

After arriving in London, I was in a queue for more than an hour to leave the airport. After leaving the airport, I was completely confused. I even didn’t know how to take the subway to the house. Fortunately, the landlord’s girlfriend was a Taiwanese. She told me how to make it. I didn’t believe that I took the right subway, but I still had to take the bus after getting off the subway. She worried that I couldn't find the way, so she picked me up at the subway station. I panicked and I swear I really appreciate it.

On the first day, I got the first half of the tattoo. Maybe since I was thinner recently, I felt that every needle penetrated into the ribs and cheekbones, causing a squeaky echo, but I tried my best to bear it. Blood and tissue fluid mixed with black tattoo ink. I wore clothes and went back to sleep at once without taking a look at the mirror. It should be very serious, but I didn’t get sense of ritual. I did not follow the draft prepared by the tattoo artist in advance. Everything was hand-picked and hand-painted on the spot. When I was asked how it was, after looking at it in general, I said it’s okay.

The next day, this half should be colored. The tattooist was afraid that I couldn't bear the pain, so he applied anesthetic. But after an hour, it didn't work. It was estimated that I drank too much alcohol. I forced myself to lie down without saying anything. Unluckily, I couldn't stand it anymore after a long time. I started to tremble. The tattoo artist asked another person to help me as much as possible, but I couldn’t control it. He said he couldn’t go on today. I am so tired that I had no strength to talk. After a while, I told him that I hoped we would try again. I would try my best. Then I thought I was back to hell again and was too tired. After that, the tattoo artist probably thought that my face was not good for me, so he called a taxi for me. I was still sick when I was sitting in the car. And my heart even stopped beating. I thought I was going to die, but no. The driver looked at me again and again in the rearview mirror, and when I arrived, I was urged to get off the car. It’s not finished. After getting off the car, I couldn’t find the house where I lived. I opened the navigation to go back and forth several times. Finally, I climbed upstairs. Yes, I climbed and sat in the bathroom for more than 30 minutes. My lips were cold, soaked by the cold sweat of my body, and I slowly climbed back to the bed, and I suffered from the disease, surrounded by the dizziness, and finally felt the pain. Finally, I slept.

 
 
On the third day, I couldn’t get out of bed because I had no strength. I kept lying until noon. I took a shower in order to avoid being infected. This is the first time I saw it. It was a bit fuzzy, very nice, but the color was not what I expected. When I arrived at the studio, the tattoo artist gave applied anesthetic to the left part and let me take a painkiller. It took nearly three hours to start. However, the efficacy of the anesthetic was almost over. Without a doubt, I spent the rest of my time in extreme pain. At the end of the second half, I told him that I wanted to modify the color of the first part. His expression was a bit complicated, and he was a little worried. He told me that it would be a very painful process and it would be much more painful because the wounds that have begun to heal. What’s worse, there would be a small risk of being infected, I just said that it did not matter. Seriously, it was the extreme pain that I have experienced in the past twenty-three years. It hurt me and made me cry even if I was a hard-boned person. I had a rest in the middle. When it was finally done, I lay down in the bed, thinking that it was what I was obsessed with, and now it was done. So what? It was not what I longed for anymore. And even for a moment, I felt that I had suffered a completely meaningless sin.

On the fourth day, I have been sleeping until noon. After changing the medicine, I started to wander in the streets in London. I suffered from pain and went to Westminster Abbey after walking more than ten kilometers. Unfortunately, it was too late and it’s closed. I sat on the chair in front of the church for a long time. At that time I was out of my mind and I couldn’t think of anything. Then I stood up and limped back. It seemed that time became very slow and it became very long. I tortured myself those days. But the only reward was that I can sleep well without you and without a nightmare. Because wearing a very thin pajama and walking on the road, I could touch its edges and corners through the pants, like a faint relief. Due to long walks and sweating, there was a burst of pain.
 
On the fifth day, I walked for 23 kilometers. Because I didn’t know how to take transportation and I gave up to study, it was fortunate enough to see the scenery of many alleys and streets in London. I also bought a pair of my favorite martin boots. After changing the medicine in the afternoon, I came back and took a shower. There was a lot of skin on the vest. It has already begun to fade. Do you know what it looked like? It liked a real snake in the suede, the snake I had raised. As for the skin, the thin layer was brittle and somewhat white, but unfortunately there were still two or three infections, but it was okay to leave it alone. Just like the past five years, there are always some concealed but ultimately lingering shortcomings. I slowly began to accept people and things that are not perfect. Even though I have made up my mind to give up you, a unworthy person, At that moment, I still wanted you to be there. If you could touch it, you could feel the process of its transformation. You would understand how much I love and hate it.

At night, I had a meal with the landlord and his girlfriend. The landlord was busy. He asked Lin and me to go to the pizza shop. When we went out, it was raining outside. Two people ran all the way. When we were waiting for Dany's, Lin talked a lot with me. I probably talked about why I came to London and our story. She said that I was crazy, a madman and that you were not worthy. I said that it was not true and she should not care too much about my side. She said that if a hand could not applaud, then my fault was that I completely lived in my imagination. In my own imaginary world, I wanted to buy you a ring. I wanted to marry you. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you, but I never told you. I have been making my own determination and planning it by myself. She said that it was unfortunate but unavoidable to break up with you. But I thought that the bitterness I had suffered for you was actually there. Must I tell you these? Those I couldn’t talk to others, the pressure and responsibility that I felt and the pain of separating the two places, I thought you understand everything and thought that we didn't need to prove anything through words. But the truth was, you didn't understand anything at the beginning; you didn't care, and you didn't want it.

On the sixth day, I couldn’t pack all of my stuff, so I bought a suitcase and went to the umbrella shop to pack the umbrella. The suitcases were very heavy. I was able to move it. But the wound hurts even though I just walked normally. I had to go up and down stairs many times to drag them down. After walking for a long time, I took the subway finally. The stairs at the subway station were very long. A black boy came over and helped me to carry it. I asked him how to take the subway. And he happened to be on the same subway. After I got on the subway, I couldn’t catch my suitcases, so they hit others. Later he helped me with the luggage all the way and told me where to get off. We chatted on the software for a few days. He said that he was a student, he asked me if I would return to London in the future, I said I probably won't. He asked me why and told me not to give up because of bad experience, everything would be fine. He said that he believed that I was a very good person and gave me the ways to contact him. I hope I can contact him. I swear I am grateful again, but I did not contact him anymore.

He arrived at the destination earlier than me. After I got off at a certain station, I felt that something was wrong. I quickly returned to the subway that had not left. I even rushed to the airport with a guess. Finally, I realized that some stuff I’ve bought had no tax refund. As for the remaining tax refunds, I couldn't communicate with the staff. Thanks to the people next to me translated for me. After checking baggage, I had to spend more than a thousand more for the extra two pieces. My credit card couldn't be brushed at the airport. I had to go to get cash. I didn’t know how to use the ATM. With other help, I got my cash. When I came back to communicate with the counter staff, it was the Chinese who knew that I was anxious and he helped me. Everything was finally tough, and after I had done it, I went outside and asked for a cigarette. When I was sitting on the side of the road, I was finally surrounded by the tiredness and sadness accumulated in these days. As you know, so many strangers who have nothing to do with me helped me. And when I was the hardest and most tired, where were you, the one who said “I love you”, the one who said, “I will be always your family”. She even chose to push me down in a messy crowd and then turned away. She wouldn’t say anything even when I was surrounded by fear and anxiety and despair. This was the person I had loved for five years. This was the ridiculous feeling that seems to be inseparable to live together for five years. It was still not enough for this seductive world and a few months of distance. And half of it is because I didn’t want to give you too much pressure, so I took all the responsibilities myself. You gave me a real surprise. This worthless relationship really made me sad.

I have completed our journey alone. Don't worry, I will go, I am just used to be there.

The diary is a bit long and maybe a bit embarrassing, but it was the most real feeling at that time. Please kindly read it.

When I met her, I was 17 years old. She was 7 years older than me. At that time, in order to get independent soon, regardless of my family members' opposition, I insisted on being a tattoo artist instead of going to college. And when I was preparing my own tattoo studio two years later, my family let me choose between the institution and the tattoo industry. At that time, I still respected her opinion and believed that she needs stability. But I didn't give up the tattoo industry. I spend all my spare time and weekends in continuing my research. I also had to take care of the entertainment at my company. I often didn't have time to sleep or rest. My body was getting worse. I just worked hard for two years. Last year, she went abroad. I got anxiety. I did not dare to tell her because I was afraid of affecting her studies. I still worked hard to save money while suffering from a mental disease. The year she needed companion most was just my busiest year. I neglected her. She chose to break up. I pretended to take it easy. But because I used to treat her as a whole, I finally collapsed. I tried to kill myself but failed. I was out of control and was taken to the hospital. My family was also exhausted because of me. My last reason was that I didn’t want to make my family members feel pain, so I tried to stay alive. But I still hope that some people know, and I hope she can know that those days when I neglected her I worked hard for the promises and future life, and those days when I did not do well enough, I still apologize. Some stories are called classics in the past, they are called fool now, some feelings in the past were called affection, and now they are jokes. I am not afraid of other jokes, I love her, no matter what life I am living, I hope that she will always be fine. 
As for the tattoo, her zodiac is a snake, mine is a rat. Some people say that snakes and rats are in a nest. Some people say that snakes and rats are the same. I never believe in fate, and I never fear gossip. Although I broke up, I still completed it like a mission. On the contrary, it has the meaning of loving and hating.

When I was a tattoo apprentice, I got up early and slept late. In order to save money, I only spent 50 pieces a week including transportation. Because I don’t come from a wealthy family. I always hoped to rely on my own ability, one day, I can give her a clean and comfortable life without depending on my family. So I force myself to adapt to everything which is not necessary in their opinion. I don't like to express myself very much. I always like to work hard by myself. Now I finally understand that it doesn’t work if someone just knows to work without many words. In fact, it's not as good as others' sweet words.

Later, I earned more money and bought a lot of professional tattoo supplies, but I didn’t have the chance to use it again. After I got an anxiety disorder, my state and energy were not as good as before. After breaking up, I have no courage to face all the things that I have been familiar with and have worked hard for. I finally said goodbye to the tattoo industry, resigned from the work of the public institutions, and gave up everything. Luckily, I still have a deep feeling for tattoos. Later, every time when I wanted to give up, I think I should insist on due to the tattoos I got hard. And the tattoo is the only thing that I have. I may not be able to become a tattoo artist again, but I will continue to be tattooed for the rest of my life.

The Fan's diary:
Going home from work, then packing my bags and buying a movie ticket. This is the first time I went to the movies myself after I met you.
When I got home and lying on the bed, I was thinking, this thing we said at the beginning that we had to do it together,
and finally, I still have to finish it myself at the last minute. You really have no chance to do it with me. Is this what you want?

I have not made any more money, and making money is not important to me. From the first day I fell in love with you, I promised to give you a home.
The hard work of making money these years is not to let you live uncomfortably in my mother's and my uncle's home.
I know that I can't rely on others if I want my own home. So do you think that I have always been a very money-loving person?
So you thought I was a workaholic? It’s raining outside, the first rain of the year, and then I ate the fish-flavored pork and the caviar.
I haven’t eaten these things since you left. Banks and restaurants are still there, the rain is going down, the sky will soon be clear, everything is still there,
but you are gone, what a small thing, the world is only I will feel sad, the saddest Yes, I still have to find ways to live.

Suddenly I felt very uncomfortable after getting up in the morning, followed by nausea,
and actually spit out bloody sputum... I don't know if there is something wrong with my stomach.
At this moment, I envy you, you are new in the new environment, newcomers, and I can only feel like a fool
I don't feel uncomfortable most of the time, but at some point, maybe in the middle of the night, maybe in the morning,
maybe at noon, I will suddenly remember your voice. You may wonder how I will become like this. I have lost interest in anything but you.
I thought we would be a family, but you went so far, when you came back, I lost you.

I want to say goodbye to you again. In those sad days, I even blame all the mistakes on myself. In fact, when I met your beginning,
I thought that we might separate, but when I was Seeing your face, I still fell in love with you without hesitation.
Blame me for not expressing to you, blaming me for trusting the tacit understanding between us, now I know that you really don't understand me. I am always afraid that you will be controlled by the bad guys and become prisoners, but for you, maybe I am the bad guy from beginning to end.